Find your style, find your niche, be unique, standout, do this, do that, if it’s not working then you’re not doing it right, don;t be too loud, don’t be too quiet. Blah blah fucking blah. I just want to turn it off. Turn off the noise. Shut it all out. Shut it all down. And say see you later. I want to run to the woods and blast music and throw paint, and get sticky from gluesticks. I want to play in the dirt with my kid. I want to not feel like I am a burden. And I don’t know if I feel like a burden to myself or to my inner critic.
Im messy. My story is messy. Currently it feels like a tangle of fairy lights or yarn or something. Trying to piece it together and roll it back so it makes more sense to me, which unlocks things I may or may not be ready to deal with, accept, move past.
